Whilst you sleep
by nut-tree
Summary: Rory thinking about his life and so on - set a little before "the god complex" one shot -cannon -includes rory/amyness - please r r!


***authors note***

I haven't put anything up in a while mostly because my laptop's poorly and I can quickly research stuff on the internet with it which really slows stuff down. There is more harry potter on the way but here's a little monologue from Rory Williams that I happened to get finished, hope you like!

The weird noises of the Tardis always seem to wake me up early- If I had any sense I suppose id have …I don't know….trained myself to sleep through it in some way. But it is nice sometimes to wake up early – lets me get used to the beyond weird reality we're in at the moment, get a bit of quiet before the doctor comes running in (without knocking.) shouting about the planet of the turnip people or whatever he's into that day- sometimes it's like having a child . A genius alien child with an unhealthy hat obsession.

Most of all though- I just like some time to be with Amy. Just her. Before now I've woken her up but she always ends up either wanting to get up at right that second or else wanting to do…er…other things- which is brilliant and all but kind of takes away the point of "quiet time". So now most of the time I let her sleep and just watch her breathe for a while- holding onto every moment like a thirsty man cupping water in his hands. We're both still here, whatever else is going wrong with the world right now, we're both still here.

Still, I can't help thinking about the other Amy- the one that could have been. I know what it's like to wait and wait for the person you love without any guarantee of them ever actually coming back to you. I waited for two thousand years, protecting and guarding the body of my wife-girlfriend then, I guess. Some people watching that would call it brave, maybe, but for me it's always been about Amy, my whole life, and leaving her when there's even the smallest grain of hope would have been like chopping off my own head.

I'm not going to pretend I never did give up hope or lose control for a minute, but I guess it comes down to whether you trust the Doctor or not. I did. (Which I can tell you is pretty hard to say about a man in a bow tie and a fez.) I never really got why Amy didn't trust him when it was her turn to wait for us, for me. I mean- he came before didn't he? Although he was a few years late and messed up quite a lot of her childhood in the process, I suppose, but still….maybe it's something I should ask her one day.

I probably sound so stupid thinking about all of that when right now I've got everything I ever wanted,(except a Jag E-type)but knowing about the billion or so things that could blow us apart any second kind of gives you a perspective I suppose. Amy casually flirting with every guy we meet doesn't matter, whether or not I snore like a pneumatic drill (although I swear she's making it up.) doesn't matter- making sure we both know that the other one loves us when it could be the last thing we ever really know….does.

Even taking that into consideration I'm pretty sure a lot of people would think it was insane to live like this. But although travelling through space and time with your wife and her imaginary friend wasn't exactly what I had in mind when I used to think about the future, at the end of the day it's fun and its… mad and it's what Amy wants (Funny how those three always seem to go together.) Of course it's not real life and it's pretty much suicide, and if we do ever get through this then of course I still want the house and the car and the …..another baby, one day. But for now ….well we get the whole universe, don't we? And although he's like this big mysterious alien man-time lord thing, the doctor's amazing too. To be honest it's kind of like getting to hang out with the cool kid on the street for a while, even though you know he's probably going to have a whole new best friend in a couple of days, you still stay and put up with so much just because they're them. Again, a weird way of thinking that just kind of feels right.

I wonder if Amy knows that it has got to end, sometime. We've both heard The Doctor talking a bit about people he used to hang around with back in the day, and occasionally he even disappears for a while to visit the ones that are still around. We've also seen the times he couldn't save people. Reading into this a bit I know that it's basically 50:50 chance whether we die a bit earlier than planned but still live way more than most people ever do, or if we just have the best-late gap year ever and then get to do the whole going old together thing too….there's also another option but I don't want to think about that.

But Amy….I don't think she really understands that this isn't completely forever yet. I mean, she does talk a bit about home sometimes, but never as though she really considers it an alternative to doing this, and I'm pretty sure the "little girl" part of her still expects the doctor to be a hero every time and never let us down, which let's face it just isn't true. We've had more than our fair share of luck and miracles. Maybe that's why it broke her so badly when he didn't come back for 36 years, maybe that's why she was even more devastated than River when he died.

River/Melody/Mel, I mean. I still can't get my head around that. For a few hours we had a baby daughter, for eleven years we grew up with a best friend and now on and off this woman we hardly know pops in and calls us Mum and Dad. It's easier not to think about.

Come to think about it, Mel did have a slight American accent for a while when I first met her, but then that was also the first time I met Amy so I wasn't paying too much attention.

I know for a fact that Amy didn't see me as anything except the gullible kid with the giant nose for ages, but I knew as soon as I met her that she was beautiful. When she's running around and pressing shiny buttons on the Tardis and stuff is when I seem to notice it the most these days, when we were younger it was always when she was talking about the "raggedy doctor", but she says it's weird when I stare at her when she's awake, so it's only really in the mornings when I can check she hasn't grown an extra head or anything and actually have a look at who I'm married to. I'm never disappointed.

It seemed to take ages for the other boys at school to notice, she was always such a tomboy, but by the time we were about thirteen she always had a group of besotted guys following her around. I used to be pleased that she didn't think of me as one of them until I finally realised that it was because I was a friend (who she apparently thought was gay) and they were people to kiss behind the bike sheds (err, not that we had bike sheds at our school but ,you know what I mean.)

I did try to do all this big stuff to try to impress her and make her jealous and so on, but they always seemed to end up with me , still stupid, gawky, Rory Williams – looking a complete idiot while Mel and Amy tried their best to look sympathetic while laughing their heads off.

But apparently sometime during that train crash of an adolescence Amy started to see me in the way I'd never been able to help seeing her- and eventually we worked everything out and got married and here we are, so who am I to complain?

The lights we've got fitted which pretend to be windows are getting much brighter now and losing some of their pinky glow. My wife is asleep in my arms, muttering something Scottish sounding in her sleep and occasionally kicking me, supposedly by accident. Our best friend is a couple of doors away, quite possibly thinking about our daughter and almost certainly planning something for today that we've never done before. We are in an actually working time machine.

My name is Rory Williams, The nose, The last centurion, the pretty one, the boy who waited. And life doesn't get much better than this


End file.
